I do plan on dumping him, but I don't know how. I think I am still with him because I think if my test comes back positive for genital herpes he is the only guy who will ever want me if he did in fact give it to me or I have to stay with him because I may have given it to him. Somedays I feel like I can hand the idea of having herpes for the rest of my life but other days I am not so sure. I am so afraid. Its funny I use to say I never wanted to get married and have kids, but this situation has made me realize how much I want those things and now I may never get the chance. I guess thats life. Funny, as I write this I remember the first time I had sex with him he told me he used a condom but I don't think he did. I am such an idiot. I pray my blood test comes back negative. If it comes back positive life for me will be over.
Human herpes virus 5 (HHV5) is the official name of cytomegalovirus (CMV). CMV is also a cause of mononucleosis. In people with healthy immune systems, the virus may not even cause any symptoms. It can be sexually transmitted, can cause problems to newborns, and can cause hepatitis. CMV can be transmitted through sexual contact, breast-feeding, blood transfusions, and organ transplants. CMV infection is one of the most difficult complications of AIDS. It may lead to diarrhea, severe vision problems including blindness, infections of the stomach and intestines, and even death. For a virus that barely causes a problem in most people with healthy immune systems, it can be amazingly nasty in people with damaged immune systems, such as people with AIDS.
A 2004 study in the New England Journal of Medicine found that suppressive therapy decreases the risk of HSV-2 transmission from symptomatic, infected partners to uninfected partners by 48%. So “the risk of transmission is significantly reduced, but cannot be eliminated even with suppressive therapy,” Johnston explains, and she stresses that the virus can be passed along even without signs or symptoms.